30-Days to Harmony, Day 7
"Invite in the gardeners the bloom, and keep out the goats that consume."
Protecting Your Garden of Life
Welcome to Day 7 of our journey toward harmony! Today, we are going to talk about a concept that may seem amusing at first, but is deeply important to maintaining balance and peace in your life: keeping out the goats. In Chapter 7, I introduced the idea of "goats" and "gardeners"—terms that help us identify the influences in our lives that either nurture us or drain us.
Your life is like a garden—rich, vibrant, and capable of growing wonderful things. But it needs tending, and it needs protection. Just as I learned while growing up surrounded by the Wasatch Mountains of Utah, the key to cultivating a healthy garden is maintaining strong fences and gates. If you don't take control of those gates, goats—both literal and figurative—will invade and consume everything you've nurtured.
In today’s post, I'll guide you through the process of recognizing and guarding your life’s garden, ensuring that only what enriches you is allowed in, and keeping the goats out.
"You should hold your life sacred and protect it at all costs from those trying to deter you from your vision for your life and future." - Trina Celeste
The Story of the Garden and the Goats
Growing up, our home was always surrounded by an expansive garden. It was a place of refuge, peace, and hard work—a place where we planted, weeded, and harvested together. It was also a place we fiercely protected. As my mother used to remind us every day on the top of our morning chore list: "Close the gates, and keep the goats out of the garden." If I let the goats in, there was no escaping the consequences—I'd be scrubbing toilets for days. It wasn’t just about keeping animals out; it was about valuing the space we worked so hard to nurture.
This idea of keeping out the goats goes beyond just my childhood garden; it’s a powerful metaphor for our lives. Goats are the distractions, the toxic relationships, and the unnecessary obligations that consume our time and energy, often leaving us depleted and overwhelmed. Gardeners, on the other hand, are the people, habits, and activities that nurture our growth and enrich our lives.
In your journey to achieve life-work harmony, it is vital to identify who and what the goats are in your life—and to actively keep them out.
Identifying Your Goats
The first step in protecting your garden is to identify the goats. These are the people, activities, and habits that consume without giving back. Goats can be intentional—people who take advantage of your kindness without reciprocating—or unintentional, like overcommitting yourself to obligations that drain you rather than fulfill you.
Think about the relationships in your life:
Is there a colleague who always demands your time but never offers support?
Do you have friends or family members who make you feel guilty for pursuing your own dreams?
These are the goats that push through your gates, trampling the garden you’ve worked so hard to create. They may come in the form of toxic work environments, emotional manipulators, or even negative self-talk. It’s time to recognize them for what they are and start building stronger fences.
Setting Boundaries: Building Your Fences
Once you’ve identified the goats, it’s time to build fences—strong boundaries that protect your garden. Boundaries are not walls; they are gates that you control, deciding who and what is allowed into your life.
Setting boundaries requires clarity and courage. Here are a few steps to help you build your fences:
Know Your Priorities: To protect your garden, you need to know what you’re nurturing. What are your top priorities? Is it your mental well-being, family time, personal growth, or career advancement? Once you are clear on your priorities, it becomes easier to determine what aligns with them and what doesn’t.
Learn to Say No: One of the most powerful tools you have is the ability to say no. No is a complete sentence, and it is your right to use it whenever something doesn’t serve your garden. Saying no to a goat means saying yes to something that truly matters to you.
Communicate Clearly: Once you set a boundary, communicate it clearly to those around you. Let people know your limits, and don’t be afraid to enforce them. Whether it’s telling a colleague that you can’t take on another project or telling a family member that you need time for yourself, clear communication is key.
The Goat-Gardener Dilemma
Not all goats are obvious, and sometimes we confuse goats for gardeners. You might think that a certain person or habit is beneficial, only to realize that it’s actually draining you. Perhaps you’ve had a boss who seemed supportive at first but was only interested in their own success. Or maybe you’ve been engaging in activities that you thought were fulfilling but left you exhausted.
A powerful exercise is to write down the people and activities in your life and categorize them as either goats or gardeners. Reflect on how they make you feel—do they energize and uplift you, or do they leave you feeling drained? This simple exercise can provide profound insights into where you need to set boundaries.
Walking the Fence Line: Regular Maintenance
Just as our family would walk the fence line on our ranch to repair gaps and prevent cattle from wandering in, you need to walk the fence line of your life. This means regularly assessing your boundaries and ensuring they are still serving you. Life changes, and so do our needs, which means your fences may need to be adjusted over time.
Take time each month to evaluate your boundaries:
Are they still protecting your priorities?
Have any new goats shown up that need to be kept out?
Are there gardeners you should find more time and space with to help you grow?
Maintaining your fences is an ongoing process, but it’s essential for creating and sustaining a harmonious life.
Tune In Moment
Today, take some time to reflect on the goats in your life.
Who or what is consuming your energy without giving anything back?
Write down one boundary you can set today to protect your garden. Whether it’s saying no to an unnecessary commitment, reducing contact with a toxic person, or setting aside time for something that nourishes you, take action to build your fences.
Your life’s garden is precious, and it deserves to flourish. Protect it fiercely.
Guarding Your Life Garden
As we continue this journey to life-work harmony, remember that your garden is yours to nurture. You have the power to decide what grows there and what doesn’t. You have the right to close the gate on anything or anyone that threatens your peace, and to open it to those who support and uplift you.
It’s time to take control of your garden—to identify the goats, build your fences, and invite in the gardeners who will help you grow. Harmony is not about balancing everything; it’s about intentionally choosing what belongs in your life and fiercely guarding what matters most.
Are you ready to strengthen your fences and create more harmony in your life? Book a one-on-one Life-Harmony Consult with me, Trina Celeste, and let’s work together to protect your garden. Use code “HARMONY30” for 30% off your session—let’s nurture your vision and keep out the goats, together.
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